Sunday, July 04, 2004

Cowboy Boots and Southern Twangs

I have to write about something very momentous, something that occurred in my life just this past Friday.

I got cowboy boots. And when I say cowboy, I mean cowboy boots. They're guys' shoes. They didn't have anything cool (or practically anything at all) for girls, though they did have some "fabulous" thigh-high Cruella De Ville boots. Yikes. Since I'm not preoccupied with looking like some kind of grand arch-villainess and spawn of children's nightmares, I thought I'd pass.

The ones I got are nothing fancy, they're just good solid work boots. I'm just relieved they fit me at all; I got one of the smallest sizes they offered (after trying on my brother's shoes) and they're just about right.

I'm not a cowgirl. I never have been. My only concession to my southernhood is the fact that I say "yall" and that--at least according to Cris--I sound southern in my emails, but I was once told if I didn't say "yall" I wouldn't sound Texan at all. I can't stand country music, I don't like western wear, I hate barbecue, and I've never owned a pair of cowboy boots in my life. Until now.

Of course I haven't escaped living in the South without a few marks of it rubbing off on me. I do actually like a few country songs; I just don't like the typical "My wife left me, my dog left me, my truck left me" songs. And I hate that twangy, whiny instrument--or whatever it is--they put in some country songs. And I don't mean the guitar. Well, if it's a guitar that's doing it, I don't blame all guitars. It's just a tragic perversion of an otherwise beautiful instrument. Aside from that, I sort of like barbecue sauce; I just don't like the typical way barbecue is prepared. I have had far, far too many family reunion experiences composed of the stuff, and I am sick of it.

My reasons for suddenly going against all that is sacred and tradition to me, and buying a pair of cowboy boots? Well, my motives are partly practical. I wanted something I could go hiking and wandering in and know that if a snake tries to bite my ankle it'll get nothing but a mouthful of leather. I've read that's the best protection against snakes is just a pair of boots since they are most likely to aim for your ankles (considering anything else is a bit above their altitude). I was looking at regular non-cowboy boots at first, and then I found combat boots and I thought that would be cool, but then I stumbled on some cowboy boots and got to thinking. Cowboy boots are kind of cool sometimes; it might be fun to have some. Of course the ones I really wanted were gorgeous--a beautiful red color and...ostrich skin? Whatever; they were $300, and that's a little out of my league.

So now I have cowboy boots. Is this the first step down a slippery slope toward cowboy--er, cowgirldom? We shall see.

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